Dear Mad'am VailE'd

Thanks for bearing with me while I went a few rounds with technology. I do love our back and forth, so when you told me you were working on another post I may have done a little internal dance. Much like one that our lovely SQ would do, with glitter showers, roller skates, and good ole fashion ass shaking. No one can shake a booty like SQ. Just. Fucking. Sayin'. Shout out to our homegirl if she's reading this. #MADFLOVE

On to that conversation between us, and Ms. Scarlet. I do recall my 'description' that caused a moment of silence before bouts of WTF laughter. The 'mate' vs 'non-humping mate'

I was merely trying to be clear about my use of the word mate. As you would very well know, you are from the United States, and I'm from 'down under', aka Australia. Our definition of mate is different, so I was wanting to be clear. Which was how we ended up with 'non-humping mate'.

Yes, my mind went straight to sex. We were talking, for those playing along at home, in the context of soul mates. Specifically that a soul mate could not necessarily be what is defined by romance, but alternatively a person that you are connected to on a soul level over multiple lifetimes. That could be sexual or non-sexual. A humping mate, or a non-humping mate.

When an Australian says mate, we don't mean your life partner or a mate that you have sex with. Well, perhaps you do. 'Mates with benefits' is perfectly acceptable down under, but that's a whole other post. Rather, we're referring to a friend, either male or female.

Humping mate = mate in the romance definition, non-humping mate = Aussie definition.

So in summary of that randomness, mates, the world over can be placed in both the humping and non-humping category. There you have it, you just learned something here.

I accept chocolate and whiskey as forms of gratitude.

Now to answer the actual purpose of your post, questions.

Do you think that once you become that fancy shmancy published author, you'll change?
Everyone changes. Life, in general changes people. We grow and learn. So yes, I will change. However, I know that's not what you were referring to.

If, let me emphasise that point, IF, said 'shmancy' status happens, then other than a busier schedule, not much will change for me. You'll still be my web designer, my graphics team, and the awesome friend that I love and adore. Just, I'll be paying you for the first two. And well, the last one, will be business as usual in exchanges of #MADFLOVE and bitchiness.

Do you think that once you have accomplished your professional goal, that you'll start to taper who you are personally to fit within the confines of their (the publishers) as well as your fans expectations? 
If I do, then I hereby command you to fly your ass over here and give me the flaying I deserve.

I consider writing as a form of artistic expression. To put myself in the confines of their expectations (doesn't matter who 'their' is) completely negates both the artistic element of the craft, and the expression. I think J.K Rowling got it right. She wrote the books she wanted to write, the story that needed to come out of her. Not what the publishers, fandom or Hollywood wanted. As a consequence, she is still sane and functioning.

I also think that it would be a damn hard thing to do. A woman like Rowling would be under a lot of pressure to conform. Which is where awesome people like you come in. You call me on my bullshit, cut me down to size, and tell me how the fuck it is. I love and respect you for that. It is people like you, that 'big names' need to keep them grounded. 

I don't claim to be perfect. Though, if I believe in something, I'll fight to the death for it. This I believe in. Nobody puts Hayden in a box and tells her to conform. Big shit, or small fry, expect more of my charming personality.

And if you aren't willing, do you think that lowers your chances of reaching that professional success?
As a nobody, yes. Right now I am nobody. If I don't play the game, make the right moves and spank the correct asses, then I think that will be limiting, if not detrimental, to my career.

That being said, I am still me. Alysha Hayden is my brand, and I know very well what that brand is. That will not change. Rather as a noob I must prove myself and my brand, and to be honest, I welcome that challenge.

When an author has a well established brand, I believe at that point they can start to push back a bit more. By that, I don't mean self-publishing, or refusing to do things, but rather experimenting in areas that would have been too bleeding edge for the industry to support you without your 'bestselling' brand behind it. It makes sense. This is business after all. And anyone who thinks otherwise is an idiot.

Regardless of who you are, or what you're doing, you need to stay in touch with you. I am me, that will not change. Period.

And in closing ... weeeeeeeee!